


Supernatural Sam Winchester x Reader: Stay

by rocksalts_and_winchesters



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Castiel in Purgatory, Dean in Purgatory, Eventual Romance, F/M, Falling In Love, Fluff, Other, Protective Sam Winchester, Reader-Insert, Sam Winchester Fluff, Sam Winchester-centric, Some Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-26
Updated: 2016-08-26
Packaged: 2018-08-11 04:13:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 6,749
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7875775
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rocksalts_and_winchesters/pseuds/rocksalts_and_winchesters
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As an Emere, you're sent by Sam Winchester to rescue his brother from purgatory. After completing the task at hand you finally meet Sam face to face.<br/>Both the brothers are extremely grateful for you help and you're asked to stay with them.<br/>Can Sam convince you to stay?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Purgatory

**Author's Note:**

> Btw an Emere is a mythical creature but dw it all gets explained ;)

The crisp leaves crush underneath your body as your rise from the cold and uneven ground. You groan and bring your hand to your head before properly taking in your surroundings.  
You were orbited by large looming trees swaying in the wind. Their creaks and rustles being the only sounds breaking the otherwise silence.

"Okay, Y/N remember the plan." You tell yourself, reaching for your weaponry. Thankfully, they'd made it.

Days went by and you didn't find him. You'd killed hundreds of monsters. You name it. You've killed it.  
Or perhaps not killed. You wondered if you could ever kill something already dead.

The morning was no different than any other, you untie yourself from the safety and height of a tree, grouping the rope and stuffing it in your backpack. You climb down, scout out the area for food and walk North.

The afternoon, however, you found him.

You stopped the moment you heard shouting. Fighting, to be specific. Creeping along with the surrounding plant's as cover, you spy two men fighting off a number of werewolves. You load in the silver bullets and take aim from afar.  
Shoot.  
It fell to the floor, slumped against a bloodied tree.  
Shoot.  
You just miss.  
Shoot.  
Another crashed down, clutching it's wound before being kicked down by one of the men. Both of which were far too busy fighting to bother looking for you.  
Shoot.  
You move in.  
Shoot.  
Three down. 

Everyone stops and checks the beasts are definitely dead before looking up at you in confusion. "Who the hell are you?" The slightly shorter one says, he had a light beard and a baker boy type hat. "You're Dean Winchester." You pointed at the one in the leather jacket, matching the photo you had been given.

"Yeah. This here's Benny." You look up at the one who spoke. He was as scruffy as the other and looked tired.

"How come you're in purgatory?" Dean asked, taking a confident step forward.  
"I've come for you. Your brother sent me."

"He wouldn't do that. He'd come himself." Dean shook his head in disbelief.  
"I'm sure he would if he could. But not many people can travel to Purgatory."  
He frowned "So how come you can?"  
"I'm a species of Emere. We can travel to one of the lands of the dead. Only I'm one of the last. Most Hunters kill us before realising we're not bad. On fact, a lot of us are hunters. Myself included." You explain.

"An Emere. Yeah I've heard of em." Benny nods and you're thankful for that.  
"Wait, there's someone else down here. Castiel. He's an angel, he- he's my friend. If you're helping me, you're helping Benny and Cas too."  
"Okay sure…Sam warned you were stubborn." You noticed Dean realised he hadn't said Sam's name yet. You hoped that was a good thing.

"Well then, let's go find Castiel."


	2. Castiel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The search for an Angel in a trench coat begins.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I understand the chapters are short but I will be updating as much as possible so bear with :3

In the short week or so you'd been with Dean and Benny you had to admit they weren't bad people. Once you get over their "badman" attitudes they proved to be intelligent and nice hunters. You were grateful for Benny trusting you, even if Dean wasn't one hundred percent on board with it. But you figured he trusted his brother. Sam certainly trusted Dean anyway.  
"I still don't understand exactly how we're supposed to find one man in the middle of this endless forest!" Benny sighed. Neither him or Dean had the patience you'd acquired over the years.  
"You're not exactly the half-full glass type of guy are you?" You remark.  
"I'm just being a realist, here." He states firmly.  
"Not helping. Besides, we quite literally have all the time in the world." You shrug.

"Yeah well Sammy doesn't." Dean joins in bitterly.

This wasn't the first time you'd heard him refer to his brother as 'Sammy'. It tended to be when he was worried, or sometimes scared. Not that he was the type of man to admit he was scared. You wondered if Sam was. 

"Just because we have the time doesn't mean we have to use it." You assure them "Hey what's that?" You point up at a small cabin a few feet away. It had a tree branch that had crashed straight through the roof sticking out of the porch. Ivy plastered the rotting wood and small drops of blood covered the otherwise green plants.   
"Think he's in there?" You ask, looking straight at Dean.  
"Why would I know?" Dean shrugged it off.  
"You're the only one here who knows him. For all we know he might not exist." You holdup your gun and inch towards the shelter.

You position yourself to the left of the door, Dean held the handle and Benny took the right. On the silent count of three Dean swung the door open and you span round, aiming your gun inside.  
A somewhat tall man was collapsed on the floor. He wore a tan trench coat over a shirt and blue tie not quite done up to the top. He was hunched over, his arms putting pressure on what appeared to be a stab wound. A pool of blood had stained the wooden floorboards.  
"Cas." Dean rushed past you and knelt down next to the angel.  
"Dean?" The Angel looked more confused than anything. He stared up at you with deep blue eyes and then to Benny. "Who are these people?" He coughed.  
"This is Y/N and Benny. They were helping me find you. Y/N can get us out, Cas." Dean examined the wound as best as possible without a med kit as you stood back.

"You're an Emere." Cas noted.  
"Yeah I am. And you're an angel."  
"Yes."

"Can you walk?" Dean asked Cas.  
"Perhaps." He answered, using the help of the table and Dean to stand. He took a small step forward and nearly collapsed. You rushed forward to help steady him.  
"You should probably go without me." Cas stated bluntly.  
"I've worked my ass off finding this place we're not leaving you now." You retorted, helping him back up.  
"Come on, you can lean on me." Dean put Cas' arm round his shoulder and they found Cas moved better with the aid.  
"Thank you, Dean." 

Benny held the door open for them before saying what you were all thinking: "Let's get lost."


	3. River

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Close to the barrier back across to Earth you and Dean make sure the area is safe to rest.

"Y/N, we need to stop." Benny ran over to you. He'd offered to take the rear while you stayed up front for safety.  
"We're close." You told him, but stopping anyway.

"Cas needs to rest. His leg's swollen."

"Okay. We can spend the night here. I'll scope out the area for nearby monsters. I'll need a partner."

"I'm staying with, Cas." Dean declared, helping Cas down on an old log to rest.

"No, you did that last time. I've got it." Benny decided, grabbing a blade from your backpack.  
You nod. "Dean, you're with me. Benny, shout if you need anything." You toss him some more bullets.  
"I'll be fine, Dean." Cas assured him.

Dean nodded and walked off, leaving you to chase after him. "Don't worry, your boyfriend will be fine." You tease.  
"He's not my boyfriend."  
"I know. Look, Dean, We're almost out of this place. That's a good thing. You trust me, right?" You ask, handing him a gun.  
He takes it and doesn't answer for a while. You both just keep walking towards the river. "Got no reason not to." He shrugged. And that was good enough for you.

"So are you and Sam a thing or...?" He asked, leaning down to fill up the bottles with water. You kneel next to him.  
"No."  
"Oh shame. You seem like his type." He smirked lightly.  
"I don't tend to date men I've never met." You chuckle.  
Dean frowned "You've never met him?"  
"No. He called me up about his problem and I said I'd help. We spoke over the phone a lot but never actually face to face." You explain, twisting the lid tightly.  
"Oh. So you have some kind of purgatory one o one website?" He sassed.  
"Nah, Missouri gave him my number. You know, the psychic?"  
"I guess that makes sense."

He looked like he was about to add some other sassy comment but you ssshhh'd him and cocked your gun.  
You both rose up, guns pointing outwards. "Vampires." You whisper, putting the gun away and getting out your machettes, handing one over.  
"How do you-" loud hiss answered him from behind you both.  
You turned to see a woman, she had an arm missing and looked extremely angry.  
"I think this is their nest." You point out.  
"You think?!" Dean sliced her head off in one clean scything motion.

You then both turn back, round, almost falling in the river when you see five more the other side. They were hunched over, bearing their sharp teeth, and hissing.  
You both prepared to defend but when nothing happened for a while Dean decided to question it. "Why aren't they attacking us?"  
"Water." You point down at the river and laugh. "They can't cross running water."  
"Wait, seriously?"  
"Seriously. The way here without crossing the water is miles back. We're safe here." You declare, holding your hand out for him to pass back your blade. He hesitates, watching the vamps for a while before reluctantly placing the handle in your palm.


	4. Flashback

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A flashback of when Sam called you up for the first time.

After having finished what appeared to be one of the hardest hunts you'd ever attempted solo, you were keen to have a well-deserved shower. You grabbe your pijamas and some fresh towels and nearly made it to the bathroom when your phone buzzed.  
You sighed, dropping the pile from your arms to the Motel bed and check the caller ID: Missouri.

Unfortunately, you couldn't ignore a psychic.  
"Hello?"

"Hi, hun. Listen I- Oh. Sorry about your shower I'll let you get to that as soon as possible."

"No it's fine. What's up?"

"Ever heard of the Winchesters?"

"Who hasn't?"

"The youngest, Sam. His brother died a while back and he's tracked him down to purgatory."  
You knew exactly where this was going. You were an endangered species of Emere. Able to travel between purgatory and Earth.

"And he wants me to get him back?" You guess. Well. You know.

"Sure does. I gave him your number but I thought I'd warn you first. You know, give you time to prepare." 

"Okay, thanks."

"You know I normally wouldn't land you in these kind of things but this is a Winchester we're talking about. Who knows what will happen if you don't help. I don't want half the planet dying for one life, Y/N. And I know you don't either."

"No I know. I'll help him. Thanks for letting me know." 

"No problem, honey. Talk soon." She hung up before you had a chance to say goodbye in return.

You sat down on the bed, staring at the frankly hideous wallpaper and thinking things through.  
In less than a minute your phone rang again and 'Unknown' as the caller ID. 

Winchester.

You pick up, mentally carrying out a funeral for your shower,  
"Hello?" You try and sound as cheerful as possible.

"Hi is this Y/N Y/L/N?"

"I take it you're Sam?" You question him too, saving the 'I don't want to bother you but...' speech.

"Uh...yeah it is." He sounded surpised.

"Missouri said you'd call." You explain.

"Oh right. Did she explain everything?" He asked. His voice was deep and curious. Yet sweet and calm.

"Yeah. I'm sorry about your brother. Well...you know." You didn't know whether to laugh or not.

"Thanks. So uh, will you help?" He asked kindly. You could hear he didn't want to sound too demanding but he was clearly desperate.

You sigh and lean back on the bed. "Sure. I'll help."


	5. Portal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The four of you reach the portal back home and it's your job to make sure everyone passes through safely.

After a long rest and a quick sip of water each you headed North. North was the way to go until you come across the portal back home- a blue shining mist with embers of fire spitting from the sides. You'd crossed through before many times but never with another being, let alone three.  
Benny took Cas from Dean who looked even more exhausted than before sleeping, he caught up with you none the less. "Any idea here we're gonna turn up when we go through?" 

"Earth." You remarked. You'd been avoiding this question for a reason.

"You know what I mean." He pressed. "Y/N?"

"You'll all wake up in your graves."

"Great." Dean sighed sarcastically. "So what we have to ninja our way out of them? Crawl through?"

"Pretty much." You nod.

"What about you?" He questioned further.

At that moment you spy the gleams from the portal back up. "There it is." You smile, glad to be ignoring Dean's question.

"That thing?" Dean squinted.

"That thing is our ride. Be nice." You chuckle, turning round to catch Cas and Benny's attention. "Hey guys we made it!" You call. Benny grins and you could have sworn you saw Cas throw you a smile.

"Cas, you should have your angel powers back when you pass through." You tell him and he nods. "The way through was nothing but an entrance to cave to anyone who passes by. But with an Emere nearby it lights up and pulses." You explain proudly.

"Then what are we waiting for?" Benny questioned, his voice thick with relief.

"Dean, you first. Then Cas. Then Benny. I'll go last to make sure it closes properly." You instruct in such a manner that all three men nod and question nothing. 

Dean walked up in front of the entrance, his leather jacket hanging loosely off his shoulders. He then turned back around and looked straight at you. "Will we see you? On the other side?" He sounded almost scared.

You smile "If you want to." 

He nods and turns back around before taking a step forward to the point of no return. At first it was as though he was quite literally walking into a cave but then he slowly faded away. Cas followed suit, with the help of you and Benny getting him up. Then Benny.

Then you.


	6. Flashback

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another flashback of your second phone call with Sam.

You needed to call Sam. In your last call you both decided it was best you gave it a day or so to rest and prepare before jumping into purgatory and so not much planning got done. But now you couldn't put this off any longer and Sam deserved his brother back as much as anyone did.

You were sure to shower first this time before scrolling through your contacts.  
He answered almost instantly.  
"Hey Y/N." Sam sounded tired yet determined. You couldn't help but smile at hearing his voice again. It was so reassuring to hear.

"Hey." You reply, opening up one of your many books on purgatory.

"So uh, what do you need me to do or say or-?"

"Well you need to not panic because that makes me panic," He chuckles at that "And I need to know what he looks like. There are thousands of human-looking people down there. If you have a photo of him or something could you send it over?" 

"Yeah sure."

"Thanks."

"No problem...so how do you get over? Is there uh some kinda ritual or secret entrance?" He asked. Sam was clearly a curious person.

"Let me worry about that."You roll your eyes. "Sam, do you remember where you buried him?"

"Yeah, not far from where I am. I've got an address somewhere if you-"

"No don't tell me I don't need to know. This is gonna sound really strange but I need you to go over there and dig up some of the dirt around it. Because when your brother goes through the barrier back across he's going to wake up in his body,"

"Right."

"So you need to make it easy for him to climb out of."

"Okay yeah. That makes sense." 

"But don't bother digging him up completely that'll draw too much attention." You add, making sure he understood.

"Okay and lastly I'm asking because of bad experiences but is there anything you need to warn me about him?" 

"Uh not that I can think of. I mean he's stubborn, but uh, that's pretty much it."

"Okay I can deal with that." You laugh a little under your breath. "I'll call you up as a heads up but other than that I've got everything I need." You close up.

"Sure. I'll talk to you soon then."

"Yeah. Bye, Sam."

"Bye, Y/N."

You hang up and lie back on your bed staring up at the ceiling in thought when your phone buzzed. You looked down to see Sam had sent you a picture of Dean.

It felt strange knowing what Dean looked like but not his voice. And then knowing Sam's voice but not what he looked like. if anything, you were a little disappointed Sam wasn't in the picture. It would have been nice to know.


	7. Unknown?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After waking up you receive yet another phone call- still no shower :(

You wake up with a stir. Your head was a haven of numbness as you stumbled on your feet. You go straight over to the mirror and tilt your head up, adjusting your neck to get the right angle. There it was. Healed up since you'd returned from the other side but the scar was their. It would stay, just like your other ones would. It was white and slightly red since it was relatively fresh.  
The gun was next to the blood stain. Your blood stain.  
If you were remembering correctly, it would have three bullets left in it. You pick it up and strap it to your belt, under your jacket. You then head outside the building.

It was large and abandoned. All the buildings you'd had to do this in before were too, it saved you from the risk of someone finding your body. You weren't keen on the idea of waking up in a grave...or a morgue. You frown at the idea.  
Still a little shaken from the process, you decide it was best if you just got going. You got in your car and left the scene.

Arriving at the next motel, you asked for a room for the night and locked yourself away. You lay back in your bed wondering if you really meant what you'd told Dean.

Would you ever see him again? Or Cas? Or even Benny?  
Would you ever get to see Sam?

You turned your phone in your hands and sighed. It wasn't out of the question that you could quite easily just call him.  
Whenever you did this before you would call up the person to make sure everything went okay but this just seemed wrong. Who knew whether they were in the middle of something or not. They were the Winchester's after all.

That's when your phone buzzed, bringing you from your daze. You sat up, your mind immediately thinking it was Sam and getting excited; You checked the ID and...unknown. You frowned and hovered your thumb over the answer button. Hundreds of thoughts ran through your mind about why you should focus on resting and showering and recovering in general in stead of answering, but your thumb seemed to have decided before your brain.

"Hello?" 

"Y/N?" You lean forward, frowning. It wasn't Sam...Who else? 

Of course.

It was Dean. "Dean?" You couldn't help but smile.

"Hey. We made it out." He sounded so relieved. You'd made a good choice agreeing to help.

"And Cas and Benny?" You ask.

"They're fine...all thanks to you." 

"It is kind of my job...well...besides hunting." 

"Yeah about that...where is it you live?"

"I don't. I just kinda drive around motels. How come?"

"We're just wondering where you are. See if we can make it in a night's drive," He paused, almost as if he was checking who was nearby "Plus I think Sammy could do with knowing who saved his annoying older brother."  
You chuckle "You're in Kansas, right?"  
"Yeah, know how many miles you are from us?"  
"Think so, you're at the men of letters bunker?" You question further, looking at the maps loading up on your laptop. A small blip from where you'd traced the call.  
"How did you- You traced it didn't you..." He corrected himself, not bothering to add a questioning tone as he already new the answer.  
"Sure did. See you in a day or two." You hang then hang up.


	8. Bunker

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You drive to The Men Of Letters Bunker and finally see inside.

Blasting your favourite playlist, you drove through the busy streets of Kansas, Lebanon was directly North from where you were.

You were nervous to a point where you considered it pathetic. You had no reason to be? You'd see Dean again which is fine as you considered him a friend at this point. You'd then meet Sam, his brother.   
Maybe it was the fact that Dean seemed to think you two were together or that "you seemed like his type" got to you more than it should have. 

Either way, you gripped the steering wheel tighter than usual as you sped along the roads.  
As you neared Lebanon you slowed the car down below the limit. You'd never been great in social situations. You preferred to keep yourself to yourself. Especially as you weren't seen as "human" by most. Not that hardly anyone knew.  
It was a well kept secret you were more than willing to keep.

You parked the car a few feet away from a Chevy Impala- 67. You weren't exactly all that knowledgeable when it came to cars but Dean had spoke about his 'Baby' more than often enough for you to remember and know this was it. Dean had been worried Sam wasn't treating her right.  
You cringed when he first referred to his car as a she but then got used to it. It seemed like part of his personality.

The bunker entrance was where you'd expect the entrance for a cave to be. It had an rectangular door with a wooden rim arched off by neatly laid bricks which was then squared off by concrete. There were a few steps down to the entrance and the entire thing was surrounded by trees. You were intrigued to say the least.  
Most Emere's had heard of The Men Of Letters Bunker. It's said to contain many books on mythical law. Something Emere's were naturally curious about.

You rocked back and forth on the balls of your feet before heading down the few steps. The door itself was thick and wooden with plenty of locks and wardings for demons: well thought through.

You knocked. Three times seemed enough. Three quick and semi-loud hits. At the same time your phone buzzed, most likely a text, but you ignored it and just waited patiently.  
The door swung open just as you wondered if they weren't home and Dean was at the door.

He was shaven, now. Clean and presentable. You smiled at him and he hugged you. You hadn't expected him to but you hugged back non the less. "Good to see everyone made it." You chuckle.

"Come on in." Dean opened the door wide and you followed him down the steps. You stared wide eyed, having to remind yourself to move as you took in the vastness of the place. It was magnificent. It had everything you could possibly need, as a Hunter or not. It had what appeared to be a war room, a kitchen, winding hallways, a library, and no doubt a dungeon.

"I know right. Awesome." Dean stood proudly and looked about as though he was reliving the moment of seeing inside for the first time.

More footsteps sounded and you turned around to see a new face. "Y/N, this is Sam."


	9. Sam

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You finally meet Sam Winchester.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Btw I'm English so yeah I say Mum and chips (fries). Fite me :P
> 
> Btw A* if you notice the "subtle" Portal reference xD

Sam was a lot taller than you were expecting. You probably should have seen it coming considering how tall Dean was but somehow Sam managed to be taller. You looked up at him with a smile, taking in his features.

He suited his voice.  
He had slightly longer hair than the majority of men, his brown locks falling neatly a few centimetres above his shoulders. He had light stubble surrounding his lips and jawline where he'd shaven this morning and a kind smile. His eyes were a mixture of hues forming a brown to green formation down to his pupil. He wore similar dress to most hunters: a checked shirt, jeans, and combats. Much like what you were wearing, in fact. He was muscular and clearly more confident than you.

"Hey." You greeted, not sure what to say and hoping he'd know.  
"Hey." He grinned back.

"I'm gonna grab some grub, burger and chips okay with you, Y/N?" Dean asked.  
"Yeah that's fine, thanks." You smiled and watched him leave before turning your attention back to Sam.

"Y/N, I don't know how to thank you. Honestly my brother means a lot to me, he's really all I have left and you saved him." He looked a lot more thankful thank anyone else you'd helped and you were very grateful for that.

"No problem. It's just in the job description for me, so." you shrug in hopes to show him it wasn't a big deal but he wasn't having it.

"No Y/N I'm serious. I've done my research on purgatory and it's a real tough place. I'm sorry to make you go but-"

"Sam it's fine." You assure him, immediately worrying that you used his name.

"Well just know that if there's anything I can do in return." 

"Thank you." You smile again. For some reason you kept doing that.

Sam sat down on one of the chairs surrounding a table with a map on it- the war room. He pulled up another chair and you took the hint by sitting down next to him.  
"So you hunt?" He asked, looking like he genuinely cared which surprised you.

"Uh yeah. Well, when I'm not saving brothers in distress." You joke and he chuckles.

"Have you always hunted?"

"Since I can remember, my Mum taught me to. How long have you and Dean hunted?"

"Our Dad started when I was less than a year old so we grew up in it. It's tough for a kid." 

"You had your brother, though." You add as an optimistic point and he nods, smiling at your point as though he'd never thought of it that way.

"You don't have any siblings then?"

"Nah I don't..."

You continued to share as much with your past as you were willing, however it was mostly Sam talking about his. Not that you minded, it was fascinating listening to someone elses experiences growing up hunting. Especially coming from a Winchester.

Dean arrived back and handed you and Sam your food, sitting the other side and smiling to himself as though he'd set you up.

"So, how did you do it?" Dean asked, he hadn't said much till this point.

"Huh?" You squinted in thought, taking a chip and dipping it in your ketchup.

"How did you get in Purgatory in the first place? Is it like another blue barrier...orange?" He elaborates.

"No." You chuckle.

"Then what?" He pushed, not in a mean way. Just curious.

"Yeah come on." Sam smiled, joining in.

You raise an eyebrow at Dean. "Well...How else do you get to Purgatory?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't decide between a fluffy or an angsty ending... :/


	10. How Else

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You inevitably have to explain how you got to Purgatory.

Both Sam and Dean raised an eyebrow. "You don't mean...?" Sam didn't want to say it anymore than you did.

You nod. "You have to die to get across the barrier. Even Emeres."

"Y/N..." Sam ran a hand through his smooth hair "You should have told me-"

"Sam it's fine. It was my choice and I know what I'm doing."

"I know, I just can't believe I made you-"

"Don't worry. It's in the past right?" It doesn't matter."

Sam nodded and took his beer before standing up. "Yeah, I'm uh. I'm gonna go hit the hay." He smiled sadly and left.

You look up at Dean who hadn't said anything. "Dean?"

"Did you kill yourself to save me?"

"Well not technically no. I'm still alive so."

"That's not something you should have to do. But thank you. You know I'm uh, I'm glad you did. As sick as that sounds."  
You smiled "No I get it. I'm gonna go check on Sam. Which one's his room?"  
Dean pointed you in the right direction and took the leftovers back to the kitchen, leaving you to it.

You sighed. You knew this would happen- or something similar.   
Hovering outside his room, contemplating on whether you should go or not. You decide to knock.  
There was some rustling and then his door swung open. "You okay?" He asked, looking far more concerned about you than he should've been.  
"Sam I'm more worried about you to be honest." You sigh, tilting your head slightly.

"Don't be I'm just tired." His attempt to shake it off didn't fool you.

"That's the worst excuse I've ever heard. Come on, talk to me. We might not know each other that well but I'd trust you with my life more than half the bastards I've met."  
He chuckled halfheartedly and opened the door wide enough for you to come on in. You sat down next to him on the bed and he looked down at the floor in silence for a while before speaking.

"I don't want to be responsible for any more deaths. I know it's the price of being a Hunter but I just... it's wrong that I made you end your life."

"You didn't know. And I was coming back...I did come back." You assure him, emphasising the 'did'.

"I know but. I can't help but feel like you're someone else I've pulled into the Winchester curse."

"Hey I could have easily turned around and left. Me being here? My choice. I'm a Hunter too, Sam. It's not like I don't know what I'm getting into."

"Yeah I guess you're right." He looked you in the eye for the first time this conversation and for a moment you thought you'd convinced him but his expression changed back to a frown.

"How can you just forgive me for asking you to do such a thing?" He asked, almost wanting advice.

"I was never against you." You smile "Forgive yourself. For me?" 

He smiled back and rolled his eyes jokingly "Alright." 

"Good. Now go to sleep." You put your hand on his shoulder and lightly squeeze it before leaving.

"Night, Y/N." He called.

"Night, Sam."


	11. Mornings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You go on your first hunt with the Winchester brothers.

One week.

One week had passed since you'd finally met Sam Winchester. A man who you perhaps saved more than his brother. You just didn't realise it yet.  
The three of you got along like a house on fire and as much as you didn't want to admit it. You loved living with them.  
Hunters! Actual hunters that didn't want you dead. Ones that considered you a friend of all things. It was close to being unfathomable.

And yet there you were: curled up among the sheets, the low hum of the radio in the kitchen sounded through the walls and the running shower in the room across from you. You smiled to yourself and dragged your body out of bed. Yawning, you pulled a hoodie over your pajama top and slipped on some socks.You then tied your hair up in a messy bun, unplugged your phone from the charger and headed down to the kitchen.

You followed the smell of coffee until you reached the kitchen and opened up the door.  
Sam's tall build was facing away from you, buttering some toast and no doubt ignoring the radio. "Morning." You greeted, making yourself known.  
He twisted round and smirked "Hey. Sleep well?"   
You found it cute how he still asked. "Yeah I did actually." You nod, opening up the instant coffee jar and putting the kettle on. 

"Once you've got dressed and Dean's had his shower I think I found us a case." Sam nodded towards the newspaper opened up on the counter. You abandoned the cutlery draw and padded over. 

"UNEXPLAINED DEATH HAS LOCAL POLICE FORCE STUMPED"  
You frowned and scanned the main story.  
"Sounds like a ghost." You noted, flicking the page back to the headline and looking at the picture.  
"That's what I was thinking." Sam agreed.  
It was of a man. He was thin and tall, short hair and pale skin. Young, as well.  
"Poor, lad." You sighed sadly before wandering back to the boiled kettle.

"You up for it?" Sam asked.

"Yeah sure. We need more salt though." You noted, remembering how your last supply run was cut short by a werewolf.

"We can get some on the way." Sam decided. He then sat down at the table and continued to aimlessly flick through the rest of the paper. You stirred your beverage before going over to join him.

"Hey, Sam? Did Dean, ever uh...talk about purgatory?" You'd been thinking about it for a while.

"No not really. Was it bad?" He asked, as if he only just realised how curious he was.

"It's full of monsters. Packed. Like five hunts-worth per square mile." You explain as much as possible.

"You must be a good hunter then." Sam flattered. You felt your cheeks flush.

"Not really." You thought about how long you'd been a hunter. Emere's lived much longer than humans. They just aged slower. "Just experienced."

"I'm sure." He smirked before sipping his coffee and going back to the paper. You almost choked on your coffee, thankfully, Dean stepped into the room before things got awkward.

"Afternoon." Sam remarked sarcastically. You stifled a laugh. 

"It's just gone 12, Sammy give it a break." Dean tsked. "Besides I don't know what you're laughing about you're not even dressed." Dean pointed at you.

"These are clothes." You protested "That means I'm dressed."

"Sam laughed.

"Shut up, smartass." Dean stuck his tongue out at you, you retaliated one back.


	12. Sit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After Sam get's hurt on a hunt you have to be his knight in shining armour

You flick on the lighter, throwing it down on the bones and watching as they burned before you. The flickering embers growing and falling.  
A cry for help broke you from your thoughts. Your face dropped as you raced towards the noise.   
Sam was on the floor, his leg trapped under a heavy looking plank of wood and he was struggling to pull it off with the pain.  
You rush over and heave the wood off, sliding it to the side so his leg was free. He grabbed hold of the table next to him and heaved himself to his feet. You helped him up, letting him lean on you despite his weight..why did he have to be so damn tall?   
"Thanks." He breathed deeply, his face scrunching up in pain.   
"What is it with me having to save you Winchester's?" You giggled, helping him over to the Impala.

Dean was in their trying to find the first aid kit.  
He handed you a bandage and you practically had to drag Sam to the backseat. "Sit." You ordered, ignoring his protests.

"Y/N, I'm fine."

"Not unless I say you are. Sit." You spoke in a way that said you weren't going to say it again. he smiled at your concern and sat down.  
You unraveled the bandage, before re-wrapping it round his leg. It didn't look too bad on the outside, just some bruises, but the support would help. "Thank you." He smirked, amused at your concentrated face as you tied the final knot.  
"You're welcome." You smiled, sighing with relief he was okay.

Sam started to get up, no doubt to sit in the front. "No!" You held him back down. "You can't move too much or it won't heal. Stay."

"He's not a freaking dog, Y/N." Dean laughed.  
"But he has puppy eyes." You laughed back.

Sam stared at the pair of you with a classic Winchester bitch face.  
"Fine. I'm not in the mood to argue." He sighed, leaning back in the chair.  
You got in the other side, not wanting to take the shotgun. Even if he wasn't sat there, it was still Sam's place.

As Dean drove, the sound of AC/DC blaring though the speakers, you relaxed. Looking out of the window, you glanced at Sam's reflection to see him completely passed out. How he was able to sleep like this you'll never know. He looked so peaceful and happy he'd finally got his well-deserved sleep.  
"Hey, stop staring at my brother for five seconds, he's not gonna spontaneously combust or anything." Dean scoffed.

Your cheeks flushed red. "I wasn't." You snapped, looking back to the cars the other side of the road.

"Yeah you were." He smirked, trying hard not to laugh. "Why don't you two just elope already?" 

"Says the one who's practically married to his car."

"Don't bring Baby into this!" Dean argued.

"Yeah? What you gonna do?" You grinned.

"I'm gonna tell him!" Dean threatened, throwing his hand back to poke Sam awake.

"NO!" You laugh, pushing his hand away "You'll wake him." You pout.

Dean frowned "Fine. But I will at some point and you can't stop me."

"So long as you're okay with me posting pictures of you from your school days." You shrugged, remembering when you'd found one of Sam's kept years books. Trust Sam to keep something like that, bless him.  
"Don't you dare."   
"I will."  
"Fine I won't tell him...You're mean."  
You giggled "I know."


	13. Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The End (?) ;)

You couldn't sleep.  
You decided to be defeated by the night and stood up. After a glass of water you slumped down in one of the big chairs in the library. This was by far your favourite room of the Bunker. Surrounded by so much knowledge and so many worlds. Who doesn't love a library?

"Y/N?" Sam's soft voice made you jump in surprise.  
"Oh....hey Sammy." You smiled, not looking up.  
He frowned. You tended to call him that when something was wrong. "Everything okay?" He asked, perching on the arm of the chair.  
"Maybe....I don't know..." You looked at the clock, realising how long you'd been sat there. At least two hours.

"I heard you get up...you didn't go back though." He tilted his head like a puppy.  
"Yeah, I'm just...I don't know..."  
"You keep saying that." He joked lightly.  
"Yeah..."  
"Seriously, Y/N what's wrong?"  
"I can't do this anymore." You whispered, looking up at him with teary eyes.  
His heart broke to see you so vulnerable. You were always so strong and brave. But not now. Not here. Not with him.

"Do what?" He sat down properly next to you and held out his arms for you. You accepted, hesitating for a moment before cuddling up to him.   
"Every time I've died. I've come back to life. Always. But..." You take in a deep breath "Every time I've died it's been because of something different. Sam, I'm running out of different ways to die. One day I'm gonna die the same way and I won't come back."  
"You mean?"  
You pull a sleeve up to show some scars "When I kill myself on purpose, mostly for traveling to Purgatory, I have to get creative to make sure it won't happen in real life."  
He held your arm gingerly and ran over the scars. "And you get a scar every time." He deduced.  
"Yeah...I'm scared, Sam." Your voice quivers.  
"I'm scared of death."  
"That's okay." He nodded, assuring you it was.  
"It's okay to be afraid, Y/N. But as long as I'm here I won't let that happen. I can't do that to you, sweetheart." He cupped your face in his hands and wiped away a stray tear with him thumb gingerly.  
You stared into his eyes, hazel to blue to green the colours formed one of their own. He smiled sadly, his eyes glancing to your lips and back to your eyes once. Only once,but you saw it. This close you couldn't miss anything.  
"I love you too much to see you die." He assured you leaning forward.

You kissed: a long and passionate kiss with soft touches and every ounce of love.   
He held you close and stroked your hair, pressing soft kisses on your forehead. He took your hand in his, your fingers intertwined.  
Heat shared.  
Skin touched.  
Legs tangled.

"I won't let you go."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey you made it! Thank you so much for reading, any kind of feedback is appreciated and if you know of any good SamxReader fics please rec them to me, have a good one

**Author's Note:**

> Ty for reading I'll update asap xx


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